This post isn’t a pity party. It’s not for you to sit and think ‘oh, how sad’. It’s not for me to tell you how difficult the last few weeks have been.
I am writing this in the hope that you, the reader, will realise the importance of the life you have been given, so that it may inspire you to live your life as happy as you can and do all that you can to fulfil your life, with your loved ones.
You may have seen on my various social medias that my father-in-law passed away suddenly after being diagnosed with cancer only 5 or so weeks ago. He was given short weeks or short months to live, but very suddenly he deteriorated and after being admitted to hospital at 4am, he passed away just before 2 o’clock that afternoon. He passed away 5 weeks exactly after his diagnosis.
I won’t deny, it has been very hard to come to terms with, that the man standing so proudly in our wedding photographs, someone who you were planning to take out one last time, had so quickly gone from this world.
I wasn’t going to address directly what has happened in these past few weeks, but after watching a very moving video by chance, I realised I could perhaps make a difference to your lives by sharing this video with you and talking a little bit about recent experiences.
I stumbled across this video on YouTube about this beautiful young lady named Claire, who had advanced lung disease caused by cystic fibrosis. She only had a year or so to live at the time of this video, but she sadly passed away on the 2nd September 2018. Her outlook on life was so fresh and inspiring.
In her own words, she said –
‘Life isn’t just about being happy… It’s about what you’re making of your life and whether you can find a deep pride in who you are and what you’ve given.’
Looking back over the last few weeks, I noticed my father-in-laws attitude towards life change. He made the most of the time he had left, to the best of his capabilities, even though he didn’t have long. He surrounded himself with his family and made sure we all knew how he much he cared about us. He wanted to get out of hospital as soon as possible, to spend time with his family and sitting in his garden, which he had proudly finished designing and building last year.
But as Claire said, we are all dying. Everyone’s life will end at different times and no one knows when that time will come. But that doesn’t have to be a sad thing, it is a fact of life. Instead of being sad, we need to act on that fact and make the most of the life we are given. Tell your loved ones how much they mean to you, do the things you have been meaning to do. Spread kindness and positivity in this world, make a difference, however small.
Of course, that is not to say that I am not sad, but I am grateful for the brief time we had to say goodbye. I am also grateful that only 15 weeks ago we enjoyed our wedding day with him.
There is nothing I can say that hasn’t been said better in Claire’s video; I urge you to watch it. But please, take the time to reflect and think how you can change even the smallest thing in your life for the better. And tell your family you love them.